Achieving marital quality could seem daunting, even impossible to any couple. Achieving marital quality could be as simple as using the right words, and finding a balance, a new study asserts. The results of the research paper show that the use of pronouns such as “I,” “me,” and “my,” spoken by the spouse, and “you,” and “your,” by the patient, reflect positive marriage quality.
“It may seem like an insignificant thing, but research shows words can reflect important differences among romantic relationships,”.”Spouses’ use of first-person singular pronouns, and patients’ use of second-person pronouns, was positively related to better marital quality for both partners as the focus wasn’t always on the patient. So, it reflects balance and inter-dependency between partners.
“Personal pronoun use can tell us who the individual is focusing on, and how he or she construes themselves within the relationship,”. “It seems like a small word, but it says a lot about the relationship during a trying time. We found that focus on the spouse, rather than on the patient, lent to better marital quality for both partners. It was an indicator for us that the couple thought of themselves as a team, or a unit — not exclusively focusing on the patient.”
Researchers also found that not only were positive emotion words positively associated with marital quality, but negative pronoun use was associated with a negative marital quality.